I know a girl named Envy.
She isn’t pretty, and she isn’t ugly.
She isn’t nice, but she isn’t mean.
She follows me and likes to be followed.
She was once my best friend.
I knew her all my life, until one day she left.
She decided I wasn’t worth her friendship.
She went off to a college I thought about going to.
She got a job at a place I applied to.
She still follows me on social media.
I knew her before she made her own friends.
She would hang out with my friends at her house.
She gave them things when all I could give them are promises.
She enticed them with fake kindness and pretty pictures.
She got them to abandon me.
I know many people who left me alone.
I know many people who don’t know me.
I know many people who forget where they belong.
I know a boy named Crush.
He loves me, and he doesn't like me at all.
He strings me along and pretends it's all in my head.
He loves keeping me around.
He loves me so much, he dated all my friends.
I knew him before he had his heartbroken.
He asked me to be his friend and walked with me in the halls.
He would smile at me and say nice things.
He liked me more than his girlfriend.
He didn’t like to show how much he preferred me.
I knew him before he knew who he was.
He always needed to be the center of attention.
He put my name on a list.
He never even touched me, except for a dance.
He and I are the only ones who know the truth about how he feels.
I know many people who loved me.
I know many people who didn’t tell me.
I know many people who didn’t take that chance.
I know a girl named Courage.
She isn’t afraid, and she isn’t brave.
She wants to do so much with her life.
She is stuck in the same place.
She left to pursue new things and to repair.
I knew her before she became damaged.
She battled and conquered.
She doesn’t change her habits, even though she wants to.
She keeps around toxic people.
She trusts them, she loves them, yet she hates them.
I listen, though, I don’t think anyone else is.
She shares the inner workings of her life with everyone.
She posts her opinion for everyone to see.
She thinks the world can hear her scream.
She doesn’t know that everyone doesn’t care.
I know many people who can’t fight like me.
I know many people who can’t change like me.
I know many people who can’t be good friends.
I know a boy named Addict.
He is different to everyone.
He comes in the form of good and bad things.
He can be kinder than anyone I know.
He was someone who saved me when no one else would.
I knew him in a way no one ever knew him before.
He sang “Wake me up in September.” at the top of his lungs.
He laughed louder, and his eyes shined bright with mine.
He wanted to be saved, but pushed away from the only hero.
He loved me, even though I hated myself.
He left me when I needed him most.
I know many people like Addict.
I know many people who can’t be saved.
I know many people who pushed me away.
I know a girl.
She loves living and smiling.
She sometimes thought of eternal sleep.
She looked in the mirror and said negative things.
She lost every friend she had.
I knew her before she lost things.
She smiled brightly and laughed out loud, even when it wasn’t appropriate.
She would speak her mind.
She was confident in herself.
She never felt alone, or truly afraid.
I knew her before she got hurt.
She was used for her kindness.
She was told she was nothing, by more than herself.
She decided that she wasn’t going to be nice anymore.
I am Courtney.
I know that I am not a hero.
I know that I can’t get the guy.
I know I am alone.
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